Because really, all the shit that’s happening in Ferguson, Syria, and Ukraine? If it weren’t for this movie, we’d be living in utopia right about now.
Michael Bay’s Transformers franchise may not have the hearts of critics and die-hard fans, but the films have made a tremendous impact on the global box office. Despite an 18% rotten score, it still managed to dominate the worldwide marketplace, being the first (and thus far, only) film this year to make over a billion dollars.
But could it have been better?
When Star Wars fans were faced with overlong, under plotted prequel films, the creatives among them took to Final Cut and iMovie to chop, splice, and streamline the individual movies into something much more digestible. Looking at the latest Transformers film, the largest complaint was that it was too long, with the second biggest complaint being that there were too many plot threads that seemed to go no where, characters without purpose, and a general lack of editing.
I took the liberty of creating an alternate opening for Age of Extinction, with the idea that, if there is interest, I would take the high-quality digital copy that will be released on September 16th and spend what little free time I have to develop a Phantom Edit of a film that nearly drove me to suicide.
Why open with an amalgamation of three different scenes into one? Part of it is that the original opening had three opening scenes that were completely disconnected with the rest of the film. And the other part is that one of the best sequences of the film made much more sense as the opening scene to set the tone (what little of which there was) for the rest of the movie.
And I wanted Frasier to be at the very beginning of the film, because Frasier is awesome.
There are some problems that simple changes cannot fix. The ridiculous dialogue. Some of the incomprehensible action scenes. The assholishness of the Autobots. But could a new edit with a streamlined plot and shorter running time make Transformers: Age of Extinction be a better film?
Please note: yes, this edit is from a really, really low-quality version of the film. If we were to go ahead and make an edit, we’d use the ultra hi-def super official version of the film, because if I am going to re-watch crap hundreds of times, I want to see every pixel of every lens flare on that crap.